Q: War, What is it Good For? A: Gummi Army Guys

Sharability: 10 Denture Danger: 6 Convenience: 4 Novelty: 5 Overall: 5 Forget the plastic army guys that you can’t even eat and play with these bendy, squishy, stretchy gummi army men with guns. You’ve got four characters: the guy with the rifle shooting right, the guy with a bazooka shooting left, the guy throwing a cannon ball to the right, and the guy on his stomach, also with the bazooka. The guy on his stomach definitely works the best because he is the only one that really works in the third dimension of things, the others kind of lie on the flat surface and when you try and stand them up and lean them against something their jelly legs can’t support them and they gloop over. These are fun to play with because instead of pretending that one blew the other’s head off you can actually chomp off the head. You can’t break your plastic army men but you can cripple these guys with your appetite. But I must say, they are more fun to play with than they are to eat. The potent smell of sweet green apple escapes like tear gas as soon as you open the bag. The smooth gummi brings that smell into an overly sweet green apple taste. I guess I never expected the taste of war to be very satisfying.